Proof to fuel my hatred of clothing

I was gonna fix the title to say “clothing retailers”, but no, I think I’m to the point of hating all clothes and just being a nudist or wearing rags. I’m good with either at this point. But anyway.

I’m invited to two more weddings this year, which is fantastic and to which I look forward, no question. But of course, what to wear? So long story short, I hate most “normal” dresses and shopping in person so I went to Cute stuff. Normal-ish, but sometimes quirky. As an online clothier, they have a great system (on their app anyway) to let you filter by your measurements. You get to see the items ladies with your (reported) measurements commented on. Sweet! So I put mine in and then proof of my rage:


Nothing for me. There it is in writing, at last. So I’m bummed, but then I’m like ok, definitely my limiting factor has to be my height, right? Sure enough, there are tons of recommendations (ok, 32) from women my size, but shorter. Like 5 inches shorter. Like 11 inches shorter. And even they say the waists hit them “in a weird place”.

Alrighty. Sigh. So I’m glad we all have unique bodies blah blah. But society and wedding etiquette dictate we should cover em up.

I’m a societal outcast and now officially have no options. Naturally, this calls for chocolate.

And then I realize hey, I have a sewing machine. And double hey, I even know how to use it. Triple that, I know how to see from patterns and can sometimes even figure simpler cuts out without a pattern.

So fuck it all. I’m doing this. I’m cleaning my desk right now, getting myself a sewing area (super swears that machine is under there somewhere, probably supporting the murloc).


And know what? Chiffon might be too lofty to aim for. Draping might be difficult without a dress form. But I’m going for this, which btw is straight up a 90 year-old dress. Looks amazing. Oh, and it’s a “day dress”. Ha!



3 thoughts on “Proof to fuel my hatred of clothing

  1. That dress is amazing! You got this! I usually have a harder time fitting pants/skirts than tops (or on dresses usually having to buy big enough to fit my shoulders and have everything else taken in). I had Triana Tailor on speed dial. 🙂

    1. Yeah, I got pretty psyched reading that most of the dresses on modcloth were unlined. I’m like perfect: I’ll order big and take it in. Bam.

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